I have a friend, he's always been like philosophical and depressive, and I used to talk to him a lot, but all of a sudden he disappeared for about 3 weeks.... he didn't come to school, he didn't answer the phone, he never came online, or I suppose he did, but he'd blocked us all. He unblocked me for a few days, but then blocked me again.

I went away on a trip for about 3 days, and when I got back, all of a sudden there he was again. I talked to him on Saturday night, and he was saying things like how he didn't like me very much, and in fact, how he didn't like anyone at all much, but I just kept on talking to him, I thought, he's unblocked me, he probably needs someone just to talk to, so I stayed up just talking to him. Then he said something about how he had chemical burns, and that rang a huge fucking alarm bell, and I kept on asking him what chemical burns they were and he wouldn't say anything, and he was like "I don't want to talk about it" and "I'm sorry, I wasn't going to tell you or anyone about it" and I was like "well you mentioned it, so you obviously want to say something" but he just wouldn't talk about it.

I saw him in school today, and he just looked very shut down, he wouldn't talk, and if someone tried to talk to him he only answered as little as possible.

I am seriously fucking worried about him, and I have no idea what to do. What alarms me the most is the chemical burns.... and for him I haven't told anyone about it.

I am considering telling a teacher to see if they could intervene or whatever. My friend told me that his mother came into school today, I don't know what that was about.

I just need to know if I'm over-reacting, if I should leave things as they are, if I should try to talk to him myself some more, or if I should tell a teacher or a responsible adult? It's really screwing me over because I feel now that I know about the chemical burns and before when I used to talk to him a hell of a lot that I am very very responsible in what happens to him.

So please if you have any advice, or can tell me what to do, please tell me.

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They do things different over here, not many people know we have a school counselor, they keep her hidden.... apparently the headmistress thinks that if people know that is a counselor they'll use her as an excuse to get out of class. I think I would need special permission to go see her, the only reason I know that she's there is because when I joined the Student Union I pushed to get a school counselor but the old student union turned around and told us what the deal was.

I think the most alarming part is that he has maybe actually already tried suicide, I need to know more about these burns, I am pretty sure they are self-inflicted though, but I am not sure if they were... fuck it's so hard to talk about this. I'm not sure if he meant for suicide or if he was doing it just for the pain. Like I said, at the moment he is not talking.

I think maybe the reason his mother came in today was to tell the teachers what was happening, but I really have no idea at all, I wasn't even the one who saw her.

So maybe they know what is going on, I don't know. I am thinking that the best option for me is to go to a teacher, and then maybe they will be able to get through to the counselor for me. I know at the moment there is one side of me that is worrying about what he will react to me if I do and he finds out, but another part of me is saying that it shouldn't matter because if it comes down to him hating me forever and him attempting again, I will definetely go for him hating me forever.

I seriously am lost though because before, like on the estro boards I have given advice on matters like this, and I know what is the right thing to do, but I don't know if I am over reacting, and it just doesn't seem like it should be happening to me. So it may seem trivial, but if you could just tell me what you think, reinforce my decisions, or tell me what to do, it would make me a lot more confident in what I am doing. Thanks.

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and another thing, one that i must mention and please take it somewhat seriously. so the kid is depressed, attempted suicide. okay, that's nothing. if he wants to die, let him die (for all i care). but i do remember you mentioning that 1, he doesn't really like anybody, 2, he doesn't really like YOU either. uhh, stay on his good side aight?

i know you are worried, but if i were you, I'D BE SCARED!!

so yes, let the counselors know. let them keep your anoymousity (is that a word?).

peace nigga!

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haha, you are a girl, girls always over react! maybe you should bring in a bottle of chemicals and whip it out in front of him and see how he reacts!

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How can you say this, and then go on to say that Wolfie should take it seriously? This guy was asking Wolfie for help, and you want to make a big joke out of it? And you say he's "fucked in the head"...

Wolfie - don't worry about the school's view of the counselor at school. This is just the school's ignorance and 'dumbing down' of youth issues and problems. My view is that the teachers are there to teach you and probably aren't as knowledgable in this area as the counselor is. So go talk to him or her; they know what they are talking about. I know how much the word "trained" isn't reassuring, but it's about all you've got.

And no, you're definately not making too big a deal out of this or overstepping the line. As you said, he's the one who unblocked you and mentioned it. In the time it takes to write an ICQ or MSN message you can think about what you're writing. You don't write an entire sentence without at least giving some thought to it.

Definately just talk to the counselor about it and make sure they've got some idea of what's happening. I'm usually fairly cynical of teachers and the staff at my school, but it's reasonable to believe that if you've noticed a change in him then others have too.

And grumpy was almost right, and Snag was spot on. If the guy's mother did go to school then she must know something. He can't pin anything on you as long as there's the chance that his mother knows something too. Remaining anonymous is the best way.

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You don't want to have any regrets if the kid kills himself or others. Can you describe a little more as to what he said when he said he didn't like you and others? Could he be a threat to you or himself?

You can get a chemical burn from a lot of things. . . hell the wrong pH shampoo can give you a mild rash that could be called a chemical burn. That in itself doesn't mean much. Some people try to suicide by doussing themselves in gasoline and lighting themselves on fire. If that were the case, he'd have been gone for a lot longer than three weeks. He would have spent that long in a burn ward in a hospital, then he would have been in rehabilitation and physical therapy. I think that's what you're really fearing aren't you? That he tried to burn himself to death. I find that unlikely because it involves a tremendous amount of pain, and takes a fair amount of time, even before the person on fire becomes unconscious. Time in which the fire could be put out.

More likely the chemical burns the result of something else.

From what you describe, he's seems to be suffering from Clinical Depression. (much like I suffer from Clinical Insanity ) That is a cause for concern, because who knows what he might do. He says he doesn't like you all that much. . .but he's reaching out to you, that says something entirely different. He considers you to be a close friend and confidante. It seems like he's trying to get something out, but he can't bring himself to talk about it in more than just a round about way. The problem is, that if you push him and try to get him to tell he'll withdraw further into himself. . . that's not good.

You HAVE to tell someone Wolf. No if's, and's, or but's. No excuses. It's the only thing you can realistically do. I don't think he'll hate you for it, be angry at you yes, hate? No.

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“I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road.”

“Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change.”

Red, I have a couple of teachers in my school that I trust and am sure I can go to, I could ask them to direct me to the counselor as well if they think it is needed.

I was going to tell a teacher we share today BUT, and I know I am probably procastinating, but he has started talking to us (his friends) a little bit and is smiling somewhat. However I have decided that tomorrow I will tell a different teacher (not one we share) about my concerns, maybe about the chemical burns, but not give him his name, and see what he says. If he thinks I should go to the counselor about it, I will go.

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I went to tell the teacher who was in charge of my year, and she said that they were aware of the problem, and that his parents had been in to talk about it as well, so I was relieved. I didn't mention the chemical burns, and haven't since, to anyone, not even him.

This was at the very end of the school year, and as it finished his parents sent him off on holiday for 6 weeks, and when he came back I guess he'd had lots of time to think and he was acting pretty normal again, but as time goes by he looks happier. I was very happy seeing him dance last night!

I just thought it'd be nice for you guys to know, and I want to thank you for the advice and support.

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i just had to throw something else in. . . this is just a rant about how i feel about some things . . .
parsout, i haven't seen ya in a while, maybe cause i haven't been around for a while, but hey bro
anywayz.

america is known to overprescribe ritalin, or any drug. prozac, lithium, whatever, you name it, and its prolly over prescribed. and u know fucking what?? parents and shit, come in to a fucking therapist, saying, my child is such a goof ball at school *bla bla, I can't do my work when i'm at home. bla bla, he's off the wall at home, i can't control him.
why can't you fix my child, i'm paying you good money.
you know what i'm saying?? does anybody feel me?? you know, stfu to the fuckers who are like that. the american people (i'm american!! i'm not tryin to diss anybody, and no, not everybody is like this [this is a fucking rant!]), they are soo into fast fixes you know what i meaN?? or fast anything. we got fast food. we got delivery. we can even order our fucking groceries online, u know what i'm saying??
well anyways, back to what i was saying, these psychologists are under hella pressure. u know?? they got hella other patient's to attend to, and they got these parents who fuckin gripe about their kids. and under all this pressure, they jus start hoping maybe its a genetic cause. maybe some prozac or ritalin will do the fix.

well fuck them!! who don't take the time to actually do a damn diagnosis. and fuck the parents who are "too busy" to keep an eye on their kids.
omfg, i'm soo sorry, this was a pointless rant. but hell, it was fun as shit, and I havent' seen you peeps in hella!!
howdy do!

peace out!!

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